Day 5

Day five

Something you hope to do in your life

I have done two of the main things I have always wanted to do.

One, marry my soul mate.

Two, become a mother.

For the rest of my life I hope to be the best mom and wife I can possibly be.

I hope to make them happy. I not only hope but I WILL give Olyver the best in life.

Not material things.

I will give him support, happiness, health, patience, knowledge, and love.

I hope to be half the person Wesley is.

He makes me a better person day by day.

He is an amazing man

And I'm proud to call him my husband.

I also hope that one day I can have the patience and loving heart like my sister does.

I hope I am half the mother mine is. She is strong, and I admire her strength.

I hope to be as gentle and thoughtful as my brother.  

I hope to be as amazing as my father. (I'll leave it at that so I don't cry!)

I hope to become the person I strive to be.
So, that's that! :)

Day 4

Day four

Something I have to forgive someone for

I have thought about this one long and hard and I can't come up with a specific thing.

A lot of the things I should forgive people for, I already have long ago.

One thing I have tried to start doing is when anything bothers me,

try and think "Will this bother me years from now? Or even days from now?"

99 percent of the time the answer is no.

I'm far from perfect.

Patience is something I'm learning.

But at least I'm learning it :)

•Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
•Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
•Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
•Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
•Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
•Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
•Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
•Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like poopy.
•Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
•Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
•Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
•Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
•Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days.
•Day 14: A hero that has let you down.
•Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without.
•Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
•Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
•Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
•Day 19: What do you think of religion?
•Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
•Day 21: Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
•Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
•Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
•Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.
•Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
•Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
•Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
•Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
•Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
•Day 30: A letter to yourself.

four months

Today Olyver is four months old!!!
I cannot believe it.
It amazes me how much this little tiny 4 month old has changed my life so drastically.
He makes me happier than I ever thought possible.

He loves his daddy so much
But he for SURE is a mama's boy.
He thinks I am the funniest person alive, and I LOVE it.
Sometimes it can be extremely exhausting
But, I wouldn't have it any other way.

I love every tiny bit of him.
When I look at his fingers, hands, toes, feet, hair, eyes, lips, nose, eyes lashes, belly button, belly, chunky thighs, cute bum, and beautiful smile.
When I listen to his loud cries, his fake cries, him sucking his bink, his giggles, him talking as loud as possible.
When I see him kicking his legs in a tantrum, stretching in his sleep, staring at me while I feed him, his perfect smile while Wesley or I talk to him, and watching him suck his entire hand.

My heart melts.

Sooo, happy four months bubba!

Thank you for every second of it :)

My loves

I love being a mom.. But most of all I love being a parent WITH Wesley. It melts my heart watching them together. I love watching him kiss Olyver. I love being in the other room hearing Wesley talk to him and play with him. He is the sweetest dad you'll ever meet. He loves his little boy and it shows!

A month or two ago Olyver was crying and for some odd reason Wesley makes a chewbacca noise and it calms Olyver right down. So Oly is crying and I start chanting "CHEWBACCA!, CHEWBACCA!, CHEWBACCA!," and Wes goes right at it. I never in my wildest, most awkward dreams ever thought that would ever occur in my life.. But I'm so happy it did :)

I love those boys so much. I cannot even put into words. I never thought I would ever be lucky enough to have the life I do. I never thought I would have a baby let alone a perfect, beautiful, sweet, funny one! And I never thought I would meet such an amazing man that loves me as much as I love him.

I'm lucky. Plain and simple.

Day 3

Day 3

Something I have to forgive my self for....

This one is rough.

I honestly can't think of anything that I should HAVE to forgive my self for.

I make mistakes.

Just like everyone else.

But, everything I have done, good or bad, happened for a reason.

And brought me to where I am.

Which I absolutely love where I am, so what is there to forgive my self for?!

Anyways,

The past few days have been a tiny bit rough. Car troubles when your broke isn't exactly easy! We got it all figured out though. Thanks to Danny. I am so blessed to have him in our lives.

Olyver has his bottom two front teeth coming in. I am sad for him, but extremely excited. He is such a good baby. He only cries a little bit and just wants to be loved on. I got so lucky to have him as my son. I don't know what I would do with a screaming cranky baby!

My other wisdom tooth is growing in.. and holy... It hurts. Wesley said " My house is soo loud.. My son AND wife are teething."

haha. I love him

Perfection

So beautiful and so sweet

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Day two

Something I love about my self

I am a good mom and wife. I take more pride in being those two things than anything else. Everything I do and think about is for wesley and olyver.

I love them both more than I could ever even begin to explain. I take care off them, not because its my "job" I do it because I genuinely love to. I love making them happy.

I love my eyes and eyelashes. I love my lips, mostly because olyver has them.

Most of all I love who olyver and wesley make me. I am a better person because of them.

The challenge

So day one... Here I come! I am stealing this from Shay( love you! )
I figure it will challenge me a little bit! Who isn't up for a challenge?!


Something I hate about my self
This is much too easy for me to answer.
Besides my disgusting body,
I worry.
I worry about EVERYTHING.
I worry about every single person in my family, Olyvers happiness and health, Wesley's happiness and health, my two sweet fun loving dogs, my friends and their families, people that I don't even know that I see struggling. I worry about every animal I come in contact with. I worry about my mom, my sister, her husband, my brother and karlee.

I just genuinely love everyone so much that I never want them to hurt!
Sometimes I wish I could just... Relax!
But thats the obsesssive compulsive in me!
As much as I hate this about my self,
I love it too.
When I love and care,
I put my whole entire heart into it.

It makes me who I am. And overall, I like who I am.



•Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
•Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
•Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
•Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
•Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
•Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
•Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
•Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like poopy.
•Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
•Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
•Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
•Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
•Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days.
•Day 14: A hero that has let you down.
•Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without.
•Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
•Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
•Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
•Day 19: What do you think of religion?
•Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
•Day 21: Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
•Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
•Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
•Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.
•Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
•Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
•Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
•Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
•Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
•Day 30: A letter to yourself.

Through and through

Tonight after the looooong day poor Olyver had to endure
me and him sat on the couch and read the FIRST book Wesley and I got him.

It's called I love you through and through.

I love your top side, I love your bottom side. I love your inside and outside. I love your happy side, your sad side, your silly side, your mad side. I love your fingers and toes, your ears, and nose. I love your hair and eyes, your giggles and cries. I love you running and walking, silent, and talking. I love you through and through... Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, too.

As I read this to him I of course cried. I started thinking... I got this book for him BEFORE I had him. When I read it that day I could feel how much I ALREADY loved him. I read it today and the love I felt was overwhelming. Looking at his sweet expressions as he sat and listened and explored the pages all I could think was thank you God for giving me this little boy. I love him more than I ever thought possible.

He isn't even 4 months old yet, and I already know he is going to be an amazing man. He is calm, loving, genuinely happy, and patient. He is full of life and I'm so lucky and blessed to be apart of his.

I mean seriously.. Who couldn't love that???

( he was completely exhausted from earlier!)

Here we go...

Well well well....
I am officially a blogger! I have felt like I should try this out just because it would be a little me time! I just haven't had time to even start it up! So with the recent furlough, I have more time! Hope someone enjoys reading this!

Tomorrow Olyver goes in for his upper GI test, and oh boy... I'm nervous. This morning I was feeding him when I got a call from my papa, my dads dad. He told me he talked to his Dr about the procedure and reassured me that it would not hurt him. I loved getting this call for several reasons. First off, because it's always nice talking to him. Second off, because he felt so much love for Olyver to go out of his way to ask about the procedure. Thirdly, he felt so much love for me to call and let me know Olyver would be okay.

I haven't worked since Tuesday night, and as much as I love everyone I work with.. I seriously love spending my nights with Olyver and Wesley. I get to have dinner with Wes, watch our favorite shows, and just be next to him! I get to talk to Olyver all night, kiss and love him, and rock him to sleep. This is absolute BLISS!

Aren't the simplest things in life the absolute most amazing?